Saturday, April 7, 2012

Easter in the company of Vampires

Happy Easter. Once again, I have a little surprise. Lor wrote another holiday short staring Tommy, Drew and Lavish, as well as a brief cameo by her twin, Lux. Hope everyone has a lovely holiday and you enjoy the mess Lav makes of my apartment... Again.

The sun setting paints the sky above in a brilliant display of pinks and oranges. Mostly pink, however. I find this display to be most pleasing to the sense of my female self. I take great delight in the color pink. I am quite unconvinced as to why but I truly do. I suppose that is the only reason I tolerate the preceding festival known as Valentine’s Day.

Another useless holiday; however, has managed to tiptoe upon me unawares.


I find myself once again at a loss as to why such futile things even exist. This useless holiday centers itself on, from my understanding, a bunny and an egg. I find this most anomalous considering a bunny is born not hatched. Although I have forgotten to take into account the presence of a chick.

So confusing.

A siren blaring draws me back to the here and now. Taking a step off the ledge, I land gracefully six stories below. A cloud of powder bellows away from me upon my arrival. The neglected warehouse district smells of putrid fatality and decay. The stench of dying land is a most unwelcome thing.

Making my way towards the housing area near by, the sky above me still shines with the light of day. Others of my kind are still slumbering in their chosen haven. My brother Lux and I are of such advanced age that the light of day doth not affect us as it does the others. Granted the light is a most prickly thing; however, it doesn’t weaken us so the way it does the fledglings of the now.

All of them less than a millennia and only a handful over five centuries, all of them babes compared to Lux and I.

Lavish and Luxurious we are. The only pair of twins, to my familiarity, to obtain the gift of the ceaseless night more than three years separate. The gift was bequeathed upon me former. Much like my dearest Tommy, I found myself unable to nourish myself upon the one individual whom I share a deeper correlation then even today’s advances in science can explain. My brother, like Danny, would have stayed as he were born if not for horrifying circumstances pushed upon us forcing me to present him eternal night. A gift he sorely did not covet.

Snorting to myself, a most indignant thing, I smile as my doppelgänger, Luxe, joins me flawlessly. “Beating a path to the human’s address?” He asks with an air of indifference. Despite my brother’s finest effort I am not bamboozled. My brother is jealous.

“My dearest, Lux, is thou covetous?”

His dark chocolate hair falls in his face. “Nay, sister, I am merely inquiring.”

Watching my brother out of my peripheral, I am more than slightly amused. Now if I were a human I would label him as striking. His dark brown hair is a little longer than what today’s society deems appropriate for a man. His light blue eyes shine with awareness far beyond a man of his looking should have. His face slants with just the right angles to be labeled by the youthful debutantes of today as handsome or attractive. Normally you see, Vampires have a certain look of death. We do as well but not to the furthest extent of our younger counterparts. I accredit this to our significant age. If possible in our days of youth death rather became us. I suppose our structure contributes to this. Aw, well it matters not I suppose.

The fact that I find my own almost exact twin to be beautiful does not strike me as narcissistic. If anything it shows that I am more than aware of how attractive we truly are. I shall not lie and tell you that our looks have not played their own specific role in accompanying us to where we have been and to where we surely shall go. In the days of old our looks once lured a gentleman or lady into an ally-cove for a tasteful delight.

“Attend with me, my dearest brother. Patty demonstrates a great curiosity in making your acquaintance as does the young ones Tommy and Drew.”

“I would be willing to venture that your Patricia would undeniably prove most interested in knowing the both of us, dearest sister. We are new to her, olden vampires born of a different time and a different era. The two she is most accustomed are of this century and offer her little to inscribe. We on the other token,” turning the corner, a group of humans scamper to the opposite side of the avenue, “can proffer her much for her biographical tendencies.” The sky above now glows with the nightly specks of light.

“Aye, I do fear becoming the axis for one of Patty’s narratives. I do believe she calls them young adult novels if remembrance serves.”

“You fear a human?” he jests. “Do tell what is a young adult novel? Doth the name stay true or is it an oxymoron?”

“Nay, I fear becoming the center of a narrative not the human transcribing.” Turing another corner, Lux and I veer towards Patty’s domicile. “Aye the name stands true. She writes tomes for those whom are in-between the years of childhood and maturity.”

His soft laugh fills me with a sense of peace. “Human’s naming something that stands true is a most rare thing.” The two of us take pause outside of my dearest Patty’s home. “This is where we part. I shall linger for you at our customary place in the morrow.”

“Will you not accompany me?”

“Nay,” he smiles, “I have other endeavors that require my attendance. I shall tell you of them all when we coincide in the morrow. One or two I shall need your judgment.”

Sighing, a small smile tugs my slips. “Very well perchance next time, my dearest brother?”

“Perchance, my sister.” His smile lightens the cloud of dissatisfaction lingering over me. “I give you my word. Next time.” Now this completely dispels any ill feelings I may have harbored towards him. My dearest brother pulling me into a secure embrace ensures joyful feelings toward him for the rest of the eve. Pulling slightly away, my brother moves a stray lock of hair from my face. “Till the morrow, my sister. I love you.”

Smiling, I respond appropriately with a soft laugh, each of us kissing the other on the opposed cheek, “Till the morrow.”

Breaking away, I make my way to the back of Patty’s residence, easily jumping up onto the protruding slant of roof. Tapping lightly over the skylight Tommy once again grants me entrance. “You are going to love this,” he states flatly.

I shan’t feign awareness as to the subject matter of which he speaks. “Do what?” Climbing inside, I take note of a very defiant and quiet Drew sulking in the corner.


Now I may hold the experiences of many lifetimes and tasted the blood of thousands but even I jump in near fright in the wake of Patty screeching my name. Blinking several times, I am more than a little delighted to see Patty has colored the bangs of her hair pink, the rest mostly black with hints of blonde peeking through. I will morn the loss of my sun bleached zebra. However, I do take great delight in newest pink ingredient. “Yes?”

“Do something with him please!” Her stomping foot sounds a little too loud encased in her black leather boot.

“To whom do you refer?” I choose to ignore Tommy’s rare little chuckle from behind me. I envy him. Dearest Tommy has the pleasure of hiding behind me whilst out dearest Patty shrieks my name.

“LAV!” My ear rings in the aftermath. It would seem that my preparations for another round of a shrieking Patty are not needed. Instead she stands, pointing vigorously to poor dearest Drew.

Tommy snorts behind me. “Told you,” he says so only I can hear.


Looking between our frustrated Patty and exceedingly silent Drew, I am at a loss. “What pray tell are you requesting me to do?”

Crossing her arms, Patty covers a rather angry looking fat red bird snerking at my from the cloth of her shirt. “I pray tell you to talk some sense into Drew! He absolutely refuses to talk to me and even Tommy!”

I once again found myself blinking at Patty. “Dearest that’s not how the phrase pray tell is used.”

“Damnit, Lav! Is that the only thing you heard?” Patty’s fist land on her hip. This draws my attention to some sort of black strings going from one leg to the other.

Well that doesn’t look very smart.

Frowning, I cannot hold my inquisition. “Do you not fall in those?”

“Huh?” Patty’s glasses sliding down her nose, a fraction, adds to her overall bewildered look.

“Your pants?”

“LAV!” I once again find myself jumping from fright.

“Aye, I will have a word with him although I doubt my influence but only if you promise to stop screeching my name.”

Her only answer is to point at poor Drew once again.

“Told you.” I shall lie and feign that I absolutely did not enjoy Tommy backing away from me as I growled softly in the back of my throat.

What a smart babe he is.

Our dearest Drew starts in my sudden company. He looks to me saying nothing. I of course likewise do the same. Poor Drew’s bravado of only moments before slowly deflates under my light blue stare. He squirms rather dimwittedly towards the corner. “Lav…” he whines, “please stop.”

“Aw the ability of speech has not forsaken thee.”

I dear say if we had the ability to blush dearest Drew prospectively would at this moment. “I-She-You…” Looking away poor Drew squirms trying his best to not look at me.

I say nothing. Tis not necessary with poor, timid Drew, he will buckle under my company.


With Tommy this tactic would not work. I do believe I would have to pin him down. Well, I could just for the fun of it.

“She won’t leave me alone…” Drew finally confides in a soft whisper.

I blink.

That didn’t take very long.

Taking a moment to think, I am not dense enough to not realize poor Drew is talking of our dearest Patty. She can be rather uncomfortably prying. The scent of Marshmallows wafts to my nose giving me a delightfully enchanting proposal.

“Dearest Patty, might you have some hard boiled eggs? And perchance one of those charming egg dying kits?”

“Lav the last time you asked something like that you destroyed my glider.”

Smiling, I wave off her concerns. “Not to worry, dearest Patty, this time I shan’t touch one of your precious gliders.”

Sliding her glasses back up her nose, Patty eyes me suspiciously. I relent. Dearest Patty eyes me with something close to contempt and annoyance.

“Please, my dearest?” I request once more.

Growling, Patty storms off into the kitchen, various cabinets, cupboards and I dear the fridge’s hinges squeak under the force that is our dearest Patty. Her rummaging echoes all too loud with my over sensitive hearing. Drew’s clothes crinkle and chaff to my ears. Tommy’s sound just as clear if not more so despite his distance.

Tommy’s clothes are newer you see. The fibers of newer clothes rustle and crinkle with a sharper edge then ones of a more broken nature. Much like new versus old leather. I idly wonder if humans ever think of such things. Nay, they more than likely do not.

“Here.” Placing all of my requests on the table, I simply cannot hide my enchantment. My lovelies, also known as confetti, sit in a synthetic cup. Despite my goodly distance from my lovelies, I can easily make out bunnies, eggs with Easter designs, carrots, and rather excessively joyful chic in various pale colors.

Grabbing Drew’s hand, I ignore his slight squeak as I drag him over to the table. “Lav, what are we doing?” he whispers so only I can hear.

He takes a step back as I smile at him, his face instantly turning weary. “We are taking part in the useless holiday known as Easter.”

“Why?” Tommy asks appearing beside me. Poor Drew jumps in fright.

Sighing, I take a boiled egg and place into the container containing the pink egg dye. Tommy’s ever why is a most dependable irritation. “Because!” I declare, “connection is an order.”

Poor dearest Drew looks confused. “Huh?”

“Shoosh and have fun,” I admonish. I find that despite however many years a vampire lives, whether it be decades, centuries, or millennia the age at which they are born into the night is the age of development at which they stay. Granted one does grow but the philosophy and reason stays somewhat the same as does the immediate reaction to certain circumstances. These will forever be young ones.

How delightful.

Looking rather anxious, Drew does as I request by placing an egg of his own into the jade dye. Tommy stands in silence purely watching.

“The longer the egg is in the deeper the color will be,” Patty offers.

I look to her with a curious expression. She seems calmer now then before. Her warm gray green eyes with a dash of chocolate scan over young Drew with a curiousness one would find in a honey badger looking over a bee hive. The quizzical question of forcing poor dearest Drew to speak with her shines in Patty’s eyes. Much the same as a honey badger wishes to crack open the poor defenseless honeybee hive. Alas that is not true. Bees can sting and prick the nettlesome badger. They will fail, of course, but at least they have a chance to put up a valiant effort. Drew on the other hand has no such defense save his silence.

Poor Drew.

“I wish mine to be a lovely pink.”

“Oh, it will with how long it’s been in there.”

Smiling, I spot a wooden spoon off to the side. Snatching the spoon, I fish out my new pink egg. “LAV!” Patty exclaims.

I absolutely did not jump and almost spill my egg.

Absolutely not.

“Damnit now my spoon is ruined!” Her arms once again cross in a huff. Her lower lip pokes out in a rather cute huff.

Blinking several times at the spoon in question, I am puzzled. “How so? Tis not broken?” Patty looks as if I’ve committed a great offense. Aw well, I did execute that one human but in my justification he was a menace to society. So that can’t be it.

“Now the spoon part will be pink.” Her grave voice seems to indicate that dyeing her spoon is equivalent to offing a rather nasty human. How odd.

Tilting my head, I exam what is left of the pink dye. Pouring the rest in a left out long container, I set the whole spoon inside. Frowning, I pluck my egg out to set aside to dry.


I once again absolutely did not jump.

Absolutely not.

Ignoring Patty’s invisible fumes, I let the spoon soak for a good moment. I dear say if Patty were a cartoon character smoke would be bellowing from her ears and an indignant siren would wail in the background. A little red light should sit atop her head twirling in anger. Much like a single light a top an unmarked police men’s car in the movies.

I giggle.

“What’s so funny?” Dearest Patty asks through clenched teethe.

Smirking, I ignore her to retrieve the wooden spoon from its newest color. I think it looks rather charming although the spoon segment is a splash darker than the handle. “Good as new!”

I blink as Patty snatches the spoon from me. How rude. “Lav.” The tone used does not bode well. “Lav.” Patty takes a step towards me and I take a step back. “L.A.V.” I blink as Patty brandishes the spoon at me. I have just the slightest inkling that I am in a bit of trouble. “Lav I’ve had it!” To say that I am dazed as Patty lunges at me while trying her damndest to knock me over the head with the spoon is a bit of an understatement.

Dodging to the right, I make great haste in putting as much distance between myself and an enraged Patty. To my consternation, she pursues me ladle in hand. Now dearest Patty doth not live in squalor but she doesn’t precisely inhabit an exceedingly spacious dwelling either. My room for running quickly ran out. Dodging Patty’s whack once again, I jump for the table with the eggs and dye, landing in a crouch. Snatching a color, I hurtle whatever I have in the general direction of Patty.


To say that I am amused is beyond correct.

Patty stood frozen with her newly dyed pink wooden spoon above her head as if ready to cleave something. Her chest rose and fell heavily with her previous exertions of trying to thump me. A lovely shade of green stains her face and bangs. Drew’s egg sat snuggly between Patty’s glasses and her eyebrow. Her one visible eye glares at me. I dear say if gazes could slap I would be sporting a shiner. The phrase is shiner is it not?

Tommy’s snicker sounds all too loud. Drew’s mouth hung open. His sky blue eyes look frantically from me to Patty several times. He looks torn between amusement and worry over Patty. Amusement won out.

Dearest Drew snorts before losing it completely in a fit of uncountable giggles. His youthfulness returns with vigor as he collapses into a chair. Patty eyes him for a moment before she too falls into a fit of laughter. Drew’s egg falls to the carpeted ground with a slight cracking thunk.

Tommy and I stare on in befuddlement. “I suppose D-Drew has truly reached my goal,” he states flatly. “Being human.” Dearest Tommy still hesitates in using names. Still.

If we could cry from mirth I dear say Drew would be. “In all fairness you’ve achieved mine. Being vampire.” I think it took something close to physical restraint for dearest Drew to quit laughing long enough to say anything.

I’d like to think that I have adhered to me and my brother’s newest endeavor. Being true.

Patty leans heavily on the table. The wooden ladle lay forgotten haphazardly on the table. Cautiously, I pull the spoon away from Patty’s hand. After all, I wish not be thumped over the head. Patty’s mirth instantly vanishes when she notices her hand that once held the spoon is now dyed pink. “Lav.” The tone that doth not bode well has returned. “You broke my spoon!”

Looking down I am rather miffed to find that I have indeed broken Patty’s beloved spoon.

“What the hell!?”

I absolutely did not jump at Patty’s friend Lor’s exclamation.

Absolutely not.

“Patty you do know that shit stains right?” Lor’s indignant huff and her cocky smirk irks me in the most unfinest ways. I’ve decided I rather do not like Patty’s friend Lor. Despite the fact I have never met her before I dislike he so. Won’t Patty be disappointed?  Patty did tell me Lor would be attending tonight to make our acquaintance. She expressed to me her wish that we all get along and play nicely. Apparently Lor is a very good friend of Patty’s.

Patty’s look of vehemence would’ve made a lesser vampire shudder. “You mean to tell me my face is dyed green!”

Lor smirks. “Yea, for at least a couple of days.” My frown cannot be helped. Lor will pay for this.


Depositing the ladle fragments, I take my cue to leave. After all, I think I hear my brother calling me.


  1. *giggling madly*

    Lor... when you write Gideon's short, it's okay if you, Patty and I are in it... but please don't dye anyone funny colours. XD XD XD

  2. XD Now I want to dye all my wooden spoons. I but if I use blueberries, I can get a nice color.

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