Let's gather in a nice little circle around the campfire and have a little truthful discussion. I am going to be brutally honest with you, no holding back or sugarcoating.
I am completely bummed out my books didn't instantly take off.
It's been almost two months since I released Being Human and sales have been... Well, they are happening, but not on a grand scale that has me rolling in money and laughing madly. (Is there any other way to laugh? ^_~) Hubby's paycheck hasn't become play money.
Sure, I knew it wouldn't happen. I wasn't expecting over night success or internet sensation. But it'd be a lie if I said a small part of me really hoped that's what would happen. What author - traditional or indie - wouldn't want that to happen? Just because I'm prepared for something less than spectacular doesn't mean I've given up all hope that maybe, just maybe, something big will happen. If there wasn't that little bit of hope, then there would probably be no motivation to publish. What's the point if I'm not quietly hoping for the impossible while loudly bracing for the inevitable? I could just write my book and share with family and friends.
That little spark of hope for the impossible is what keeps us going. To imagine thousands of people reading our books, loving them and demanding more. It's a dream that can happen. Maybe not to me, or not to you. Maybe only with a lot of persistence or a complete stroke of luck. Maybe by the fifth book I publish (please note, I have no idea how many books I will publish) I'll reach that level of stardom I secretly hoped I'd reach when I first hit publish. I have no idea if or when it will happen. But I'm still hoping.
I'm not going to let reality get me down. I'm not going to snuff out my hope on the pretense of that will never happen to me. That hope keeps me focused on improving. Maybe if I make the next book even better. Maybe if I climb this hill. Get over that bump. If I keep going, maybe someday, something big will happen.
Giving up would mean giving up hope of something - anything - happening.