Sunday, August 28, 2011

End of the ride

P Day is tomorrow. Just ONE more days and Being Human will be available to the world. Just thinking about it has me feeling excited, nervous, terrified, overjoyed.

And lost.

I am feeling utterly lost. Tommy's story is done, waiting for me to hit publish, to accept my proof on CreateSpace, to let it free. Those facts just make me feel lost. While I may not have spent years on one story like others, I have put a good chunk of time into it. I've stayed up late, writing on it, put off doing house chores to edit, doused some anxiety over critiques in alcoho (FYI, I'm a lightweight. lol) l and now it's over. Finished. The end. It makes me kind of sad.

Like a roller coaster ride, it felt like it was over too soon. I don't want to get off, I want to go another round. But I know I can't. I have to move on to the next story, finish a first draft, start looking through critiques and suggestions. I have plans for other stories, ones I want to publish as well.

Maybe what scares me most is going through it again. I know I have to get back into the red ink trenches, ride the waves of emotions as I read a trusted friend's opinion. I have to get another cover made, format again, proof the paperback. All that with the same end results as Being Human: publication and that lost feeling of now what?

Can I go through all that again? Do I want to? Oh hell yes. I've already sent a story out to betas and am in the process of rewriting a short before sending that out. I have some first drafts to finish, my thoughts constantly drift to cover art and what Keary could do for the next story. I know formatting won't be such a pain anymore since I know what to do now. I want to do it all, but maybe I need to pause a moment. Take a small moment to let it sink in that one story's journey is done and the next must start.

And it's really not the end for Being Human. Now I get to see how well it sells, if people like it, read reviews. There will still be stuff to do, but the main bulk of work is done. Tommy can rest for a while (or at least until Drew starts talking to me again.) Hopefully, now that I've gotten all this out, faced that feeling of loss, figured it out, I'll find the energy to get back to work.

That is if the allergy medicine I'm taking right now doesn't put me to sleep. *headdesk*

12 comments:

  1. I am so excited for you! I have not had much time to blog and comment over the summer, but I have been keeping tabs on your adventures into self-publishing and it has been exciting. I can't wait to order your book and read it for myself!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh it's just the beginning :) You'll be fine and it's gonna do great. You'll get incredible reviews and a few horrible ones, it's inevitable. And you'll write, more and more. Just the beginning of the writing addiction *grin* good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks Corinne. I get a little giddy every time someone says they can't wait to read it.

    @Nicole, yeah, I'm gonna hide behind my hubby and make him read the bad review and give me a brief rundown of what it says before reading it myself.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Well done, writer!!! Big hug, too, for perseverance! X

    ReplyDelete
  5. Great! And congrats! Now comes the hard work (I mean marketing) but don't overdo it: remember, the best marketing is...another story!

    So back to the computer (that's what I'm doing, just finished book 2 of my Trilogy Fear of the Past and getting started on Book 3). It's work, work, work but so much...fun! Right?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Cynthia thanks.
    @Claude, I know! I'm working on more too, fear not.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Congrats! I wish you all success. Let me know if you'd like to do a guest post on my blog some time. :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm excited to see it in print and get my paper copy! And a new story?! I'm so excited!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Well, if Createspace ever gets the cover right, you can get on Cassie. Oy, had to contact them and talk to them about getting it fixed. Waiting on a response. =\

    @Max, I would love to do a guest post. Pop me an email at patricialynne07(@)gmail.com and we can talk more. (or twitter works too.)

    ReplyDelete
  10. OH look. I got to post the first review on Amazon! Yay me! :D

    ReplyDelete
  11. LOL You did and my hubby said I was cheating since you're my friend and it was the same review from goodreads. =(

    ReplyDelete
  12. Hey I did add to the review, did I not? (I think I did..but I've been fuzzy headed lately so maybe I didn't) and while I may be a friend, we were mere acquaintances when I first read it so it totally counts!

    ReplyDelete